As I was carpooling with my officemates on the way home, my officemate “Jen” was asking about my love life and how am I handling it.
J: Kamusta naman si Gerwin as a booyfriend? (How is Gerwin as a boyfriend?)
P: Okay naman. (He’s okay.)
J: Like, what are your plans in the future? Gusto ba nya sa bahay ka lang, or magwork ka, ganyan? (Does he want you to just stay at home, or go to work, etc?)
P: To be honest, I am having second thoughts to pursue a Masters degree because he wants me to stay at home and be with the (future) kids. If I want to work, he suggests na sabay-sabay kami dapat aalis ng bahay (he suggests that me and the kids will go out of the house altogether). Okay lang din sa kanya na magbusiness nalang ako sa bahay or magtend ng garden, since gusto ko rin naman nun (It’s okay with him if I venture into business that is home-based or tend a garden, since that is what I like).
For Ate Jen, who is a working mom, she does not want me to be a housewife in the future. She sees potential in me. She doesn’t want me to waste all my learnings and knowledge by staying at home. She also noticed that whenever a decision has to be made, I often tend to agree with Gerwin’s decisions, and I will not lie about that.
To be honest, I am really okay with it. I chose Gerwin because one of his characteristics is that he can lead me. He can decide for the both of us, though of course, sometimes, I need to really have a say. He helps me to decide on things by explaining it to me in detail and rationalizing it.
Sometimes, I may want to be a strong, independent, woman but oftentimes, I’m the dependent, shy-type, woman who is always behind a man. I’m okay to be behind the shadow of my husband. I don’t mind being left alone in the house with my children, because really, I am okay with that. I would love to care for my family and make our house a home. Just like my mom, who cared for us the moment I was born until now, and made our house, a home.
It is still in the future, so I still don’t know what could happen then. Let’s just cross that bridge when we get there! 🙂